I'm not dead.

Just to let you know I am still here & still reading your blogs, but I am not posting until I am under 112lb, which will hopefully be next week :)

Day #14 --

Stuffed my face friday & yesterday. This morning I was 8st 2, I think it was mostly water weight, so hopefully by tomorrow or maybe the next day I'll be back under 8st.

Day #11

I found my tape measure! I thought I'd lost it but then it just 'appeared' in my room the other day. My latest measurements are Waist - 26.5" Hips - 36". I managed to fast until I got home from school, but then I kind of failed. Well I suppose it wasn't really that bad, but here's what I ate:

Food:
3 Rich tea biscuits - 120 cal
Mums cooking - 400 cal
Apple pie & custard - 400 cal

Total - 920 cal
So, only a bit above my limit.

Tomorrow is a sleepover, which means MILLIONS of calories. I'll try not to eat much, but I probably won't be able to resist. I'll try and burn 500 cals tomorrow morning (I'll have to do it in 2 sessions), but If I don't manage it I'll do at least 250.

<-- Day #10 -->

Hmm. Well I went over my limit today as my mother forced a cupcake down my throat, but never mind, I'll only eat dinner tomorrow. My plan for tomorrow is to crumble some cereal & milk into a bowl for breakfast (to make it look like I've eaten) and then pretend to be ill at lunch so that nobody gets suspicious when I don't buy anything. I'll have to eat dinner, and I've no idea what that will be, but if moms cooking it will probably be reasonably healthy.

List of things to do/distractions:

Science Homework
Maths revision
Upload photos to computer/facebook
Tidy Room
Brush Teeth
Read wuthering heights



Food:
Weetabix + Yoghurt - 200cal
2 yellow plums - 100 cal
Cupcake - 250cal
Dinner - 600cal
Total - 1150 cal

No of binge-free days: 9

This is usually the week where I give up, not this time. My mum thinks 'I need to eat more', so I'm sure she'll try and sabotage my plans, but that won't stop me. I will be thin, I will be a size 6/8 (US 2-4). Next week will test me, 10 consecutive days with no school, my mother constantly trying to feed me things that I do not want or need. I will exercise EVERYDAY, burning at least 200 cals. I will be skinny.

Todays food:
Weetabix + Yoghurt - 200 cal
Mango + 1/4 of a sandwich - 100 cal
Tomato Spaghetti - 600
Total - 900

Good, I didn't go over my limit today, let's see if tomorrow works as well. I was just wondering, does not having breakfast actually affect weight loss, or just make you want to eat more? Just wondering as that's the easiest meal for me to avoid when I'm not at school.

Day #8 --

I can honestly say that I could have easily fallen asleep in school today, didn't really do any proper work, every lesson we just kind of sat there. Went a little over my limit, but not much. On the bright side, my 28 skinny jeans are too big now(well, they fit OK on the legs, but there is about an inch loose around my waist)! I think that 26 probably still wouldn't fit me, but I'm close! I bought a size 8 (US 4) t-shirt the other day; it fits me quite well but it is from new look which means that it is closer to a size 10 in every other shop. I can feel my school trousers are losser on my legs and my collar bones stick out more than they used to, but my hips/thighs and my upper arms are still FAT.

Food:
Breakfast - Weetabix + banana - 150
Lunch - Jelly - 150
Dinner - Beef Curry - 600
Total - 900
Limit - 900

Okay so maybe I didn't go over my limit :)

Day #7 ---

Went to the movies, I surprised myself by not eating or drinking anything during the film, I bought some mints but didn't eat any of them. Ended up only eating half the amount of sweets I said I would yesterday, so that was good. Did my 200cal of exercise this morning.

Food intake:
Weetabix and a banana - 200cal
Sandwich - 400cal
Soup- 220cal

Yoghurt - 95cal
Biscuit + midget gems - 135cal

Total - 1050
Limit - 1100



I'm thinking I'm going to need to change my plan for the next two weeks as there is no school the week after next because its half term, also there is an inset day on friday. Not going to school makes it impossible to not be forced to eat lunch, which means I will not be able to go below 1000 cals at the lowest. Also, I'm having a sleepover, which they might as well call an eat-over. This means at least 1500 cals. So If I want to keep an average of 1100 cals per day for the six weeks of my plan I'll have to change it around a bit, here's my new plan:

Food Will Not Control Me

In my last post I talked about getting out of dinner? Well I didn't manage to get out of it, but as soon as I was on my own I through it all in the bin and just ate the salad.

Todays intake:
1 weetabix - 100 cal
Lemon cake - 300 cal
Beans on toast - 400
Midget Gems - 240 cal
Total - 1040
Limit - 1100

Kept under my limit, so today was successful, I haven't actually eaten the midget gems yet, but I probably will. That kind of defeats my 'food will not control me' but oh well :)

Lists. (& lists OF lists)

I noticed that all I ever write in my post is:

1. What exercise I've done
2. How much I've (over)eaten
3. How much I weigh

So from this post on I want to start actually blogging about something, It will probably bore the hell out of you, but It will distract me from food and make me feel better. So anyways, I just feel like making random lists because all I can think of is the 712calorie bag of sweets in my draw. So far today I've had 900 cals, and I still need to be forced dinner, and then I will probably give in to the sweets. I need to find excuses to get out of eating dinner, so far all I have is 'i'll eat my sweets instead' or 'I'm not hungry'. Just counted out a bag of Tesco midget gems. The total amount of calories in one bag is 712, there are 94 sweets in a bag, so that means there are 8 (well 7.5 something, but just to be safe) calories per sweet.

Lists.

Reasons to be thin:

• Clothes will actually look good on you
• You can buy clothes from any shop without having to think 'am I too fat to wear this?'
• Your BF can pick you up without struggling
• You will feel better about yourself
• Nobody finds fat attractive
• You'll be - 'that fit thin one' as opposed 'that fat retard'
• Food makes you miserable as soon as you've finished eating it

Goals:

• 12th Feb - 111lb
• 19th Feb - 110lb
• 26th Feb - 109
• 5th March - 108
• 12th March - 107
• 19th March - 106
• 26th March - 105

Thinspirations:

• Hayley williams (when she was skinniest)
• Mary-Kate Olsen (obviously)
• Shenae Grimes
• Keira Knightly
• Annalynne McCord
• Jessica Stroup
• Anna Paquin
• Ashlee Simpson
• Avril Lavigne
• Hilary Duff

Day #8 -- Weigh In.

My Week #1 weigh in was this morning, I've put it as 112lb (8st). However, this morning & when I got home from school (after eating lunch) I was 110lb (7st 12), I checked on a different scale just to make sure and those were correct, but I'm going to wait until tomorrow or sunday to check that i'm still there. lol.

Todays Food:
Breakfast - 25g Shreddies, no milk - 100 cal
Lunch - Jelly Babies, Sandwiches & jelly - 500 cal
Planned dinner - Ham & Tomato omelette (no cheese) - I'm guessing maybe 400? Definitely no more than 500, if anyone has an Idea please leave a comment :)

No exercise today, well apart from walking briskly round school for 1/2 hour. My plan is to exercise at least 200 cals 5 times a week.

Good luck everyone :)

Day #7

Hm. Not much to say really, felt quite ill so it was easy enough not to eat much, didn't do any exercise but I honestly felt too ill /didn't have the energy. The lowest weight I saw today was 110, the highest was 112, which is encouraging, but probably not accurate.

Food:
Jelly - 100 cal.
Bit of keish + beans - 400 cal.
Total - 500 cals

Day #6 --

Just a quick post :)

CW - 113lb
Todays calorie total - 1350
Exercise total - 200 cals

Day #5 --- So far, so good.

Today went fine. Major argument with my 'friend' who I hate, its so funny :) So anyway, I've done my 200 kcal on the dance mat, so that's good for today. I'm thinking of swapping tomorrow with the 1400cal day this week as I have cake that I cant avoid (lol. it's my mums birthday). So I figured that if I eat 100 for breakfast and 100 for lunch it should be fine =D So here's todays intake:

Food:
Breakfast - Weetabix (200 cal)
Lunch - fruit jelly (90cal)
Tea - Jacket potato w/ beans + ham (600)

Total - 890
Todays limit - 900

So, I passed today as well :)

Day #4

Today went pretty well :). I didn't eat over my limit, no snacking, and on top of that I didn't really want to eat anything. I didn't have time to exercise after school, but we were running around the school grounds for about half an hour in sport so I should have burned around 200 cals anyway, which is the same as I would have on the dance mat, so that was fine. At dinner my parents put two slices of thick white bread next to my plate, I didn't eat them, I didn't even want to. Then I was offered a yoghurty/puddingy thing, I didn't eat that either =D

Food Log:
Breakfast = 2 Weetabix with semi-skimmed milk(200)
Lunch = Ham sandwich with no crusts + grapes (300)
Dinner = Vegetable (with loads of potato in it) soup (max 600)

Total - 1100
NET total - 900